You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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