If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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