Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
