Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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