you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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