am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
accomplished twins. life is a go
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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