i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
