then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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