Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
