Buhtt sex?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize