well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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