Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
