I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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