he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Floor bacon is actually really good
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
