Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
