lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
