I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
