we're chasing vodka with high fives
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
