You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
