Porn is love you can see.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
