Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize