I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I believe in your delicious
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
