That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
