So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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