were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
