I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Randomize
