I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
