is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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