We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
