dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
No subtext here. People are naked.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
