I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You may now shotgun with the bride
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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