i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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