She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
