Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
