just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
