ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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