I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
