I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
