just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
just tell him i said nine months
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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