i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
