As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
