Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
