You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
