it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
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