lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
