Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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