I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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