Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
