he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
It's just like the Real World with babies
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
