They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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