just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
