He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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